me: i'm just going to rest my eyes for 5 minutes.
me: wakes up march 27th, 2098.
Woops my 10 minute study break turned into a whole year
My Psychology Professor: People who are not depressed see the world the way they want to see it. People who are depressed see the world the way it actually is.
I wish I could just negotiate with the spiders in my bathroom
Me: Okay well I really hate killing you guys and I know that without you the world would be overrun with insects, so I love you and all, but I kind of really need to take a shower and I don't wanna drown you or have you panic and bite me.
Spider: No probs bro I'll just go hang around in that corner until you're done. By the way, your fan is getting really dirty, my cousin's been living in there and he's not so happy with the conditions.
Me: Oh that's okay I'll have it cleaned and just you can just tell him to move out until it's done.
Spider: Sure thing, man, I'll be over here until your shower's over.
